How are you doing in the processing and working out of all this stuff? Are you feeling freer already? Are you writing down and working through the baggage of your past, untangling things? Are you able to see more clearly how some of these things have been limiting you from living the life you were created for?
I sincerely hope so!! Again, I’d love to hear from you via e-mail, let me know how you’re doing, or ask a question : )
Grief is a burden that can hold us back, keep us from living life in a full way. As I mentioned in a previous section, I have experienced a great deal of loss in my life from the loss of my family growing up (parent’s divorce), the losses of family members, and even our sweet Moose dog a year ago.
Grief can be present from a loss like a break-up, divorce, loss of job, loss of a dream, loss of mobility or physical issue, and of course the loss of a loved one.
Grief has varying symptoms that come and go, much like the waves of the ocean. In my book Hot to Manage all my tangled emotions, I discuss the metaphor of grief being like an ocean, if handled all at once it would overtake us. But instead, it comes in waves, knocks us down sometimes, surprises us at times, gets us wet…and we can learn to take it just one wave at a time. We can learn to jump over it, enjoy it, tolerate it, and we can help others get through it as well. As emotions come in like waves, we can choose which ones to surf and which ones to let pass.
Grief can bring anger, bitterness, resentment, and these emotions are harmful to you. Write out your thoughts and feelings, talk with someone about them. Make the choice to express and let go. Pack these things in that old shoe box for the hall closet too.
You will likely have to deal with grief issues intermittently, never really finished with it all. That’s just the way our minds work, it’s the way our hearts handle things.
Everyone grieves in their own way. The important thing is to grieve. Work on it and work it out…let it go.
A few ideas for processing and expressing grief are:
• Journaling
• Talking
• Help people
• Read
• Listen to music
• Do an activity you generally enjoy
• Exercise
• Doing things your loved one enjoyed – music, food, activity, outing, location, book, etc.
• Carry on a cause your loved one was passionate about
Truth Section
Feelings come like waves of the ocean, we can choose which ones to surf.
Be comfortable with the ups and downs. Admit that you are weak at times, just as you are strong at times.
It is human to cry, it is human to mourn.
Every grief journey is different.
I choose to be thankful for my experiences, because I see how they allow me to meet others in their pain to offer hope and healing.
“You’re braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” -AA Milne
“Your attitude determines your direction.” -Anonymous
Choose joy. Not determined by circumstance like happiness. Joy is an inside place.
Ecclesiastes 3:1,4 “To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven:…a time to weep, And a time to laugh; A time to mourn, And a time to dance;”
Romans 12:15 “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and week with those who weep.”
John 11:35 “Jesus wept.” We are created in His image, he is full of emotion, so are we.
“Grief never ends, but it changes. It’s a passage, not a place to stay. Grief is not a sign of weakness, not a lack of faith.” -Anonymous
“There are moments which mark your life; moments when you realize nothing will ever be the same and time is divided into two parts: before this and after this.” -Anonymous
“The new normal is knowing I will never get over this loss, not in a day or a million years.” – Anonymous
You don’t get over a loss, it changes you and the scars become part of who you are.
It all begins with an idea. Maybe you want to launch a business. Maybe you want to turn a hobby into something more. Or maybe you have a creative project to share with the world.